November: Rain & Shine

Rain:

I love places where I can show up uninvited. 

Places that are another home for me where I can act as I please. I can say what I want, whenever I want, you don’t mind me, you don’t mind at all. You claim that you love having me around, that you threw the party, but no one else showed up because you forgot about them, but you knew I was coming anyway. 

I’m always the first to say hello, and never the last to say goodbye. I say: “this feels like home,” but what if it is home? I sit beside you; I think to myself: “this is what they talk about in songs,” but I soon let go of the thought, and I look at you instead because everything else is a waste of time. And if I must say it out loud, then yes, I believe we were made for each other. It is your home but here are my books on the nightstand, and here’s my cup in the kitchen sink. And whenever I say that I stayed for too long, that maybe I should go, you say: “take me with you,” and we leave like we stayed, together.

…

How do people not believe in miracles? When the history of humans on earth dates back hundreds of thousands of years ago, and yet, somehow, we get to exist at the same time as the ones we love?            Out of all the beautiful things that are now gone, all the gorgeous flowers that are no more, I would not go back to a time when there was no you. I would not have this life in any way but this one with you. 

Shine:

So goodbye, farewell my dear “what could’ve been,”
Go on but know this, and know it well,
no other thought but what if, would ever cross my mind and heart.

…

“You disappeared” they say, without making any effort to look for you, you tell them that you are still in full bloom, as clear as the sky, golden like the sun, but they have lost you. 
Because when they put you to the side, and pushed you off the center to pay more attention to something else, you simply walked away and decided that is far better to be the center of yourself than on the sidelines of someone else’s.

…

At least you are well when you are on your own, you sit by yourself, undisturbed.
You are happy, all the effort you used to put to someone else's joy and comfort now goes to the one who is truly worthy, the one whom your energy is never wasted on, to yourself.